Paris Hilton

While Lindsay Lohan was at Fashion Week, Paris Hilton and Lindsay’s boyfriend Harry Morton were caught at club Hyde flirting with each other. Paris was obviously the one doing most of the flirting.

“Paris flirted with Harry every chance she got. When he talked to someone else, it looked like she would randomly spark up a conversation just to get his attention. And every so often, she’d do a dance right in front of him.”

As if that wasn’t obvious enough, “When Paris’ song ‘Stars Are Blind’ played, she looked into Harry’s eyes and mouthed the lyrics, ‘Baby I’m perfect for you!'”

Oooo, how sultry. When a living, breathing penis sanctuary mouths those words to you, you’ll be like putty in its hands. Although, I don’t see how Harry can be with both Lindsay and Paris. I mean, won’t Lindsay’s std’s reject any competing std’s? You know, survival of the fittest and all. His penis would probably turn into a microscopic battlefield. It’ll be like Braveheart, but with lots of tiny diseases which would be pretty cute because the smaller something is, the cuter it is. It’s a fact. Look it up.