Paris Hilton

After Britney decided to listen to her people and stop hanging out with Paris Hilton, Paris didn’t invite Britney to her Christmas party and now refers to Britney as “Animal.” Why?

“Britney doesn’t think about things before she does them. She just acts out,” says the source.

I’ll just state the obvious and say Paris is a certified genius. Her perfectly timed foray into porn just shows how much thought she puts into things. If Paris was any dumber, retards would be teaching her the alphabet. As it is now, I’m pretty amazed she hasn’t stuck her head in an oven to try to get to Narnia yet. Did I say amazed? I meant disappointed.