Keeley Hazell

I’m gone for a couple of days and this happens?! Page 3 superstar Keeley Hazell had her sex tape released. As far as sex tapes go, I give this a 7. Let me break it down for you. It starts out promising at a 9 when Keeley Hazell’s mouth meets someone’s penis. Then I noticed the sound is messed up which brings it down to a 6. But unless Keeley was the one making noise, then I don’t actually care about sound which brought the score to an 8. I’m not sure how long the oral part took, but it carried the 8 through.

Then it sort of went downhill from there. The video scored a 4 after the camera was readjusted. Why a 4? Well, unless you’re turned on by an empty bed and a couple of limbs, then believe me it’s a 4. I assume at that point they were having sex, but I never found out because this cruel joke lasted till the end. So, how’d I end up with a final score of 7? Easy. +3 because it’s a Keeley Hazell sex tape. Some asshole could have spliced in one of those scary faces that pop out and scream at you and I still would have orgasmed.

See the full version here (NSFW of course).