Batman

Rosie O’Donnell first began treatment for depression in 1999 after the Columbine massacre. She says she couldn’t stop crying. These days O’Donnell fights her depression with medication, yoga and hanging upside down on a swing. Like a bat. Rosie calls it inversion therapy, I call it the discovery of a lifetime.

“…in which she hangs upside down by a swing for 15 to 30 minutes a day — something she demonstrates on Friday’s [The View].”

This swing must be alien in nature. It must have fallen from the heavens like a meteor only to be found by Rosie to dangle on. Rumor has it, you can see where she does her therapy by the large bowl like depression in the Earth’s mantle.

Note: I was too traumatized searching for pictures of Rosie. Hence Batman. He’s dreamy.

Note to the note: They killed off Captain America. Some sniper shot him. Jerk.