NBA All-Star Tony Parker’s French album debuted today. The first single Balance-toi (Translated to: Throw yourself around whose video is shown above) features the masterful lyrics,

“What, you want to dance? No, it’s not worth it. Me, I’ll stay on the sofa enjoying the vibe by raising my arms.”

I guess when you’re with a woman like Eva Longoria you’re on top of the world and have to rap about it. Honestly, I didn’t even realize my booty was shaking when I listened to this. I should have figured it out when a grip of supermodels appeared out of nowhere and clutched my butt cheeks like the guard rails on Space Mountain.