Pamela Anderson’s breasts made another appearance in Hawaii yesterday. I have examined them closely and have concluded those things are not breasts. They are wrinkly abominations. Poking one of them would be like poking galvanized steel. One time an elderly woman tapped her on the shoulder. Pamela spun around so fast her boobs smacked the woman in the face and knocked her out cold. I read it on the internet so it’s probably true.