Britney Spears

Britney Spears updated her website yesterday with a photoshopped topless picture of herself wearing a wig with these words.

The reason for this letter is to let everyone know that their prayers have truly helped me. I am so blessed that you care enough about me to be concerned and will continue to live in this brighter state with all of you by my side during this trying time. We are all the lights of the world and we all need to continually inspire others and look to the higher power. You are all in my prayers.

Love, Britney

I don’t know how my prayers have helped her. I’ve been asking whoever is up there to strike her with a lightning bolt. Nothing has happened yet. How many more babies do I have to sacrifice? Better not be a lot or else I won’t hear the end of this when the orphanages and adoption agencies catch on. Uh oh, what if I need to be sacrificing virgins. Great. What am I going to do with all these extra babies. I can’t return them and I’ve already fed them the last of the dog food. Stupid useless babies.

And after the jump, proof as to why babies are stupid and useless.