Vanessa Minnillo is a mystery

Here’s Vanessa Minnillo in a bikini with Nick Lachey again. This is confusing. The majority of the time Vanessa is doable and then there are rare moments like this where she looks like an angry Filipino lady about to beat me with a rolling pin. Kind of like post-ops. Are they a guy or girl? Or both? Does having sex with he/she make me gay or adventurous? Actually, it’s not kind of like that at all, is it? So, uh, just forget I mentioned it. Okay?