Sarita Stella

  • Drunken Stepfather: Jessica Biel in a bikini for GQ and with a really tight body.
  • Bastardly: People keep inviting Tara Reid to events like the MuchMusic Video Awards
  • CityRag: Steven Tyler is mad about man-boobs
  • Bossip: Nas hooks up with Victoria Beckham for a new track. Gah.
  • Celebitchy: If you missed the OJ If I Did It manuscript the first time around, here it is in its entirety.
  • Grumpiest: Sarita Stella in RALPH Magazine
  • Hollywood Rag: Playboy wants Paris Hilton, but her mother won’t let her because she has morals.
  • NinjaDude: Mandy Moore needs a stylist.
  • Pajiba: Veronica Mars might be resurrected into a comic book
  • ICYDK: Angelina Jolie really needs to eat something
  • Glitterati: NBC might get Jon Stewart to replace Conan O’Brien.
  • CS: Condom Man Sends 1,000 Condoms to Nicole Richie and Joel Madden. Too late.
  • JIYHB: Maria Menounos shows her cleavage
  • College Humor: Pam Anderson and Lindsay Lohan almost kissed one time. True story.
  • IDLYITW: Demi Moore might be pregnant.

Bonus: The best 5 seconds you’ll spend today will be watching the dramatic chipmunk.

After the jump, Hilary Clinton spoofs The Sopranos and the I Got A Crush on Obama song if you haven’t already heard it all over the news.