Paris is faking it

Ok! magazine reports Paris Hilton is faking remorse so she won’t lose her endorsement deals. Too little, too late they say because there’s little to no demand for Paris among charities.

“Paris finally saw that her spoiled brat behavior and repeated attempts to escape her sentence would turn fans against her, ruining lucrative endorsement deals.”

Charities shouldn’t be hiring Paris in the first place. Unless it’s for a carnival where you get to dunk her and in the tank are hungry piranhas and a crocodile. Although, a charity I’d like to see her help out is one that deactivates leftover landmines. She can do the deactivating. They can throw her in the middle of a minefield and tell her to run. It’ll be like Frogger, only a lot harder.