John Travolta

Recently, gay-rights groups have called for a boycott of John Travolta’s new film Hairspray because of his religion’s stance on homosexuality. Kevin Naff, managing editor of the Washington Blade and the one spearheading this boycott, says, “Travolta, a prominent Scientologist, has no business reprising an iconic gay role, given his [religion’s] stance on gay issues.”

Travolta replied, “There is nothing gay in this movie,” (besides him) and added,

“Scientology is not homophobic in any way,” he said. “In fact it’s one of the more tolerant faiths. Anyone’s accepted.”

Scientology loves their gay members. How else would they find willing subjects to test out their gay cures on like the patent pending de-gaying device? It’s basically Tom Cruise whispering in their ear, “Just tell them your not gay after this,” while they play a thrilling game of slap-and-tickle.

By the way, in the 1988 version, the famous drag queen Divine plays Travolta’s role. Divine, as some of you may remember, also starred in Pink Flamingos. If you haven’t seen it, you should go check it out. IMDB’s plot outline pretty much sums it up.

A family of rednecks and a pair of swingers do battle with one another for the rights to the title “The Filthiest People Alive.”

If you really don’t want to see it, just know Divine eats fresh dog crap near the end of the movie. This is the guy / girl Kevin Naff says stars in such an iconic role. If I was gay, I wouldn’t want my sexuality defined by a a tranny eating dog crap. Unless I really liked eating dog crap. In which case, yessss!