Ellen DeGeneres is in tears from a pet adoption fiasco. Ellen recently adopted a Brussels Griffon mix named Iggy from the Mutts and Moms adoption agency, but gave it away to her hairdresser when it couldn’t get along with her cats. The adoption agency found out and took the dog from his new home because of a clause that said Ellen would let them know if she were to give them away.

“I guess I signed a piece of paper that says if I can’t keep Iggy, it goes back to the rescue organization, which is not someone’s home, which is not a family,” she said, according to a transcript of the show.

“Because I did it wrong, those people went and took that dog out of their home, and took it away from those kids,” says DeGeneres, sobbing.

How embarrassing. I can’t believe I actually wrote about this blubbering idiot. What was I thinking? I just read something about Ellen and I was touched or I must have touched myself. I was probably looking at lesbian porn or something. This won’t happen again. The posting about Ellen and her sob dog story. Not the looking at lesbian porn because then what would I do with the 8 out of 12 hours I’m awake? Read a book? Be productive? Ha. That’s funny.