Eva Mendes

20 years before

Cindy Crawford

20 years later

Eva, just in case you were wondering, your beauty will not fade. Just look into your future aka Cindy Crawford. Same bone structure, same mole, same flawless skin. What is her secret you ask? Sex. And lots of it. Scientists say it keeps you young, so Cindy must be insatiable. Get with me Eva and I’ll keep that crow’s feet off your face. I’ll be making you feel so young that you’ll be in diapers. — Captain Swarthy

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