Tyra Banks

Tyra Banks’ fear of taking off her wig in bed has retarded her sex life. She is said to be very insecure about being seen without her wig and extensions because guys may be turned off.

“Tyra feels like guys are with her for her image that they see on TV and in magazines. If one wakes up without her glamorous hair, she’s worried he may not call back!”

I wonder if Tyra looks like Hulk Hogan without her wig or if it’s more patchy like she has mange. That could actually be useful in her line of work. Whenever she visits burn victims or cancer patients, she can take off her fake hair and cry, “I’m just like youuuu!” The kids will be so scared that they’ll defecate themselves, the nurses will drop their bedpans in order to form a cross with their fingers and the doctors will try to stab her with enough horse tranquilizer to put her out of her misery. Wait, did I say useful? Sorry, I meant to say horrifying.