Jamie Lynn ruined everything

In the least surprising news of the day, Lynne Spears’ parenting book has been “delayed indefinitely“. In essence, it’s pretty much canceled despite the spokeswoman for the publishing company saying otherwise. Huh. That’s quite strange.

You’ll also be surprised to learn 16-year-old Jamie Lynn Spears and 19-year-old boyfriend, Casey Aldridge, were in “complete and total shock” over the pregnancy. Who knew that you could get pregnant when the woman was on top or when you douche right away. What is that? A one in a million chance? Crazy.

What message does she want to send to other teens about premarital sex? “I definitely don’t think it’s something you should do; it’s better to wait,” she told the magazine. “But I can’t be judgmental because it’s a position I put myself in.”

Jamie is still an idiot. There’s no mention of birth control, condoms or that third option that proved so successful for her older sister; spinning around in a circle after sex. According to Britney, the spinning motion creates a vortex in the vagina which sucks the sperm straight out.

I also like how her and her mother went straight to the press before even telling Britney. I thought that was a nice touch.