Alexandra Paressant

Alexandra Paressant (Myspace), a French model and supposedly the girlfriend who kept Ronaldinho up all night with sex and Playstation, claims she and Tony Parker maintained an illicit affair in Paris. A mutual friend, soccer player Thierry Henry, introduced the two after Tony gave her the come hither look — it consisted of him winking at her… real hard — at his and Eva Longoria’s wedding. The two began exchanging sexually explicit messages until September 29 when they finally hooked up in Paris at the Park Hyatt hotel. This continued until Tony left for San Antonio. Alexandra says,

“We had room service. He said that Eva sexually speaking does not want to do certain things. She do not want to make love in front of a mirror, does not like certain position and thinks that sperm gives acne”

Wow. You mean to tell me this thing won’t let Tony shoot a load on her face, but this girl (NSFW) will? That doesn’t make sense. Ugly girls aren’t supposed to be choosy. They’re supposed to try harder and be grateful. This goes against the very laws of nature. It’s like Eva slapped God in the face and said, “Screw your rules, asshole.” Not only that, Alexandra has clearly proven sperm doesn’t cause acne. If anything, it might actually make your skin more awesome. Take heed women. The road to flawless skin is paved with gallons of joy juice.

Update: Tony says this is all a lie. Eva loves sperm on her face.

· “The other woman” speaks [X17 Online]
· Eva Longoria and Tony Parker Smack Down Rumors of Affair [People]