Britney did it and is in on it

Britney Spears managed to make it out of bed to attend her deposition at 10:30 a.m. on Monday at K-Fed’s lawyer, Mark Vincent Kaplan’s, office. Around two hours later, she reemerged from Kaplan’s office angry and sped away. OK! Magazine reports that Britney only spent two out of four hours in deposition. The rest is planned to be split up into smaller more manageable depositions “between now and April 9.” The reason? Britney “simply can’t sit still.” Maybe she has incontinence problems. That would explain the random gas station stops. They should provide her with a diaper if they want her to sit still for more than a couple hours.

Meanwhile, private eye Paul Barresi tells Page Six that Britney tips off the paparazzi before she leaves the house.

“Britney is in on it. [She] calls the paparazzi before she goes out. We know 15 minutes before she leaves the house. It’s all staged.” Silva adds that when four photographers were arrested last week for chasing the increasingly demented pop tart, “one of [them who] works for my company told me that Britney sent him a text message and said she was sorry. She tried to talk the cops into not arresting them . . . Money, fame, the excitement. It’s part of her life.” Barresi told Page Six that after reviewing footage of Spears with Adnan Ghalib, “[he] appeared to purposely position Britney in full view of fellow paparazzi to help them get the shot . . . It appeared that Britney is in on the sham.”

Taking pictures of Britney spears must be fascinating. Having to buy new lenses every time Britney inadvertently dribbles Burrito juice or drops a Frap onto your camera must suck. They need to make some sort of sneeze guard to attach to it like they have on salad bars. Too often have stray pieces of food flown out of Britney’s mouth and become lodged in lenses. I say no more!