There’s not enough Britney

At around 11:20 p.m. last night, eight paparazzi were pulled over as they attempted to chase Britney through Mission Hills “driving evasively at a high rate of speed and making dangerous lane changes.” Four of them were arrested for reckless driving while another four were ticketed. Britney told cops one of them tried to run her off the road, but couldn’t identify the car. She was let go. With that, she headed off to Kitson at 1:30 a.m. Even though it was past business hours, Britney made them open up.

This story would be a lot cooler if the cops tasered Britney as soon as she opened her car door and as she fell to the ground writhing in pain, another cop in the background mockingly said, “Don’t tase me, bro!” That way, I would be laughing right now instead of stifling a yawn.