Angelina Jolie

The demand for celebrity baby pictures are at an all time high. Christina Aguilera was paid $1.5 million for her baby. J.Lo was paid $6 million for her twins. However, both of these pale in comparison to Angelina’s babies. According to National Enquirer editor Barry Levine, Angelina’s twins may command almost $10 million.

One magazine editor who asked to remain anonymous said, “It’s at the point now where some stars might decide to have more kids just to collect the money from their photos.”

“It’s become big business now,” Levine said. “It’s outrageous, they’ve gotten very sophisticated. The rights are bought up now even before the celeb enters the hospital. They hire extra security so it’s impossible to obtain a photo illegally.”

$10 million to see whether Angelina’s kids turn out goofy looking or not is pretty steep. The only reason people even care about these twins is because looking at them will be the closest they’ll ever get to seeing Angelina’s vaj. I even expect to Pope to request to bless them since by touching them he’ll be one degree away from touching Angelina’s box. When he returns to the Vatican, he’ll brag to all his friends, “Dude, I touched Angelina’s babies. I got so turned on!” Surprisingly, this will be followed by extremely uncomfortable silence.