Britney Spears

A stalker who apparently hasn’t gotten the memo about Britney being over the hill has been sending her threatening letters. One of them mentions “how to bomb” while others contain “threatening language” and “weird gibberish.” Britney’s people are so concerned that they’ve handed the letters over to local law enforcement and the FBI. No investigation has been launched yet, but they’re looking into it.

According to the Spears insider, the offending communiqués have been sent to multiple locations associated with the “Gimme More” singer. And in addition to the previously mentioned creep-outs were a letter than mentioned Israel and the Middle East (obviously sent by someone confusing Britney Spears, Pop Star, with Britney Spears, Diplomat).

I assume this guy has no clue who he’s writing letters to. That’s got to be disheartening. To think you put all your time and effort in these finely crafted sonnets only to have Britney use them as a coaster or toilet paper. Why do I they even take the time?

It’s hard to tell, but that I is supposed to have a strike through it. Damnit. Consider that joke ruined.