Lindsay Lohan

Last week a still frame from a sex tape that Calum Best supposedly made of Lindsay Lohan circulated around the net. A day later, Erik, after mistyping the youtube url (wink, wink), proved it to be a fake. Clearly, Lindsay Lohan didn’t get the memo because she called Calum to yell at him.

A source, who overheard the rant, said Lindsay was screaming: “I can’t believe you would ever f***ing do this to me, I should have listened to everyone.

“I should never have f***ing trusted you.”

Lindsay screeched down the blower for so long that she had to leave another voicemail to finish her abusive tirade.

The Mean Girl continued: “It’s everywhere now, all over the net, everyone’s seen it, how f***ing could you?”

The video was grainy, blocky and had bad resolution like the picture so you can pretend it’s Lindsay if you’re into that. I couldn’t even tell what was going on. I thought it was a VHS capture of some Charlie Brown movie until someone told me otherwise. It looked like one those videos your friend sends you where all of a sudden a creepy face pops up and screams at you. I would have punched someone so hard if that happened. By punch, I mean ask them politely to stop sending me those things. Or just not as often. No? It’s ok, I’m flexible.