Patricia Heaton is freaky
March 10th, 20082 commentsEmail this

Patricia Heaton was at the beach doing her best impersonation of Cartman from South Park. “I’m not fat, I’m big boned!” You might also be alarmed that she has no belly button. As you should be. That shit be fuckin’ craayzzeeee.
Tags: patricia heaton





Though, she could have pulled her bottoms off and is out in the water taking a shit. Just like those naked kids at all the 3rd world beaches do! A little brown trout!
Nope that look is the-day-after-a-cornholing-worried-that-my-fart-will-be-a-dirty-juicy-shart-and-foul-my-bikini-bottoms look if I’ve ever seen one!
She’s got a big ol’ sloppy ass the kind that moves in every direction of the compass all at once with every thrust into her colon. Sorta like throwing a pebble into a pond you get ripples moving outward in all directions away from the source.
Measure the wavelengths of each ripple over her sloppy ass, the height of each ripple, using calculus you could then determine the force of each thrust and the frequency of said thrusts. With that information you can easily determine the how deep her colon is getting penetrated, and therefore the lenght of the cock.
Also by monitoring the variations in the ripples at ejaculation you can easily calculate the volume of ejaculate. Unless she swallows….