Rihanna loves her booty

Finally, Rihanna has revealed the secrets to her good looks and tight figure. Wait for it..It’s diet and exercise!! This is revolutionary. Earth shattering. You mean twinkies don’t give you a six pack? *picks up empty Doritos bag* “You lied to me Frito-Lay’s! You said trans fats were good for me!” Harummphh.

People says that Rihanna says:

“I have egg whites and pineapple for breakfast with hot water and lemon…For lunch I have fish and potatoes. I hate vegetables, but I make myself eat them. For dinner I have fish again.”

While her body fluctuates between size 2 and 4, she says she is extremely proud of her booty. “I keep working at it as I want it to be perfect,” she says. “It makes my clothes look good — and guys like it!”

Oh Rihanna, let me work that booty with you. Zing!! Did I go for the obvious? I sure did.

People continues:

Having been named to PEOPLE’s Most Beautiful People of 2007 list, the singer, who claims she’s 133 lbs. and 5’8″, says she maintains her enviable physique by exercising with a personal trainer who helps her in her quest for the perfect body.

Wait.. Did someone say 133 pounds? Whoa whoa.. slow down porker. That’s getting up there don’t you think?

What’s sad is that I can be 5’8″, 200 pounds, not shave for days, smell like cigar smoke, have my belly hang over my belt by about 6 inches and STILL bed the hottest girls in Hollywood. You know what that makes me? A producer.

Guest contributor: Captain Swarthy

Rihanna Reveals Her Greatest Asset: Her Bottom [People]