Amy Winehouse

At a recent party, Amy Winehouse was supposedly snorting lines of coke in the presence of a 17-year-old kid and at the same time, whining that if she doesn’t quit, she might lose her looks and the love of her husband.

“I’ve been told I’ll lose my looks over this–but I can’t give it up!”

“I’m told my scars might never heal. My dermatologist says it’s a result of the drugs and it could spread to other parts of my body if I don’t quit.

“What will I do if I lose my looks? Blake will never love me like that.”

When Amy Winehouse started complaining, it probably made the party really awkward. Someone should have just come out and told her it’s too late. Her face looks like it was caught in a grease fire. Not only that, Blake is probably so high all the time Amy looks like a character from Seasame Street. If Blake ever gets clean, he’ll start freaking out because he’ll find out Amy Winehouse isn’t actually Big Bird.