Ashlee Simpson

Joe Simpson, ever the entrepreneur, is pitching a Newlyweds type show to MTV revolving around his other daughter, Ashlee. Cameras will follow Ashlee and Pete as the go about their mundane lives. A source tells OK!:

“He knows that no one cared about Jessica before her reality show, and he’s hoping a show for Ashlee will have the same effect.”

This will suck. The most exciting episode will be the wedding night one where Pete frantically runs away from Ashlee’s vagina for 30 minutes until he crumples to the floor in exhaustion, at which point Ashlee climbs on top of his heaving body to deflower him. The rest of the season will just be of Pete sobbing in the shower.