Suge Knight

There are thousands of stories about Suge Knight and his mafia-esque managerial skills during his time at Death Row Records. The most famous being the one about him dangling Vanilla Ice by his ankles off a 20th floor balcony to convince him into signing over royalties from his one and only hit, Ice Ice Baby. Although, Vanilla Ice says Suge implied it rather than actually did it. Of course, Suge was sentenced to nine years in prison effectively putting an end to his label. He’s out now, but don’t think that prison has changed him. Nope, he’s still out terrorizing people. Except, these days he’s meeting with a lot less success than before.

On Saturday, Suge Knight was at Shag nightclub where he was overheard saying to an unknown man, “I want my money!” Seconds later, Suge and friends beat him down. Possibly because the man did not comply. Despite getting his ass kicked, the guy managed to punch Suge Knight and knock him out for three minutes. He had to be taken to the hospital and according to TMZ, refused to file a report.

I think a really funny thing to do would be to go to Suge Knight’s hospital bed while he’s still woozy from the concussion and tell him, “Ha, you pussy. You got knocked the fuck out,” and then tell him you’re Spencer Pratt from The Hills. Granted, that would only be funny for us. Not so much for Spencer.