Alex Rodriguez

Cynthia Rodriguez filed for divorce from Alex Rodriguez on Monday. It is widely believed this is because of an affair between A-Rod and Madonna. The NYDN reports that now the vengeful Cynthia is spending A-Rod’s money like it was nothing. She recently charged $100,000 to his card during her trip to Paris. She “had spa treatments, she went to the best restaurants,” says a friend. Cynthia also planned on going to Spain where Lenny Kravitz was touring. Not only that, but she also assembled four lawyers in two different states and has blocked A-Rod from seeing his daughters while simultaneously claiming he’s an “absentee father.”

The onslaught from A-Rod’s side came after Cynthia fired a legal beanball at the Yankee slugger, accusing him in divorce papers of “extramarital affairs” and calling their six-year marriage “irretrievably broken.”

Cynthia, who is also seeking private school for the children and alimony, claimed she tried everything to save their marriage.

“The Petitioner has exhausted every effort to salvage the marriage of the parties. However, ‘Alex’ has emotionally abandoned his wife and children and has left her with no choice but to divorce him,” the divorce papers filed in Miami-Dade County Family Court state.

A-Rod, if you’re reading this, I know a friend of a friend who can “take care of this” for you. I can’t give you the specifics, but part of the plan involves giving me $500,000 to bang a lot of models.