Eva Longoria

The creator and executive producer of Desperate Housewives, Marc Cherry, so desperate for ratings (hehe, see what I did there? I’m awesome) has revealed that Eva Longoria is trying to get pregnant with Tony Parker. There are rumors that Eva is already pregnant, but Marc said those pictures of Eva looking ugly and fat are part of the storyline for the show’s next season.

“Gaby is having a very tough time being the mother of two overweight, hyperactive children,” Cherry revealed of the show’s next season, which advances five years. “But Eva is having a marvelous time playing her!”

If Eva ever gives birth, that thing will take one look at her without makeup and claw their way back into her womb. But, knowing Eva, she’ll grab it by the leg and drag it back out to have their picture taken by the surrounding paparazzi. I wouldn’t be surprised if Eva told them to get closeups of her dilated cervix.