Tom Cruise on “The Hills After Show?”

Kind of. Tom Cruise taped an interview with MTV Canada’s The After Show to promote his movie Valkryie during which he was asked about The Hills. Specifically, about Spencer and Heidi’s elopement. Cruise, who had to be told what a “Hills” was, gave Spencer some sage advice:

“If the girl wants the wedding, you gotta do the wedding,” Cruise said. “It’s a special occasion, and she’ll remember it forever. Spencer … dude … you’ll realize this later.”

Listen to Tom, he knows how to control women. You lavish them with gifts and whisper sweet nothings in their ear and inject them with muscle relaxants. You don’t force them to get breast augmentation and a nose job and a shotgun wedding in Mexico. That path will always lead to resentment and fleeting fame. The trick is to stretch your 15 minutes into 15 years. Sigh. Spencer will never learn. He’ll always be a poor man’s Tom Cruise.

Update: Now with video

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