Apparently there was this inauguration thing today for our 44th President, Barack Obama. If you’re like me, you missed it because you were staring at Marisa Miller’s tits for an hour and a half. While it should make for an interesting and pretty pathetic story for when people ask what you were doing when our first black president was inaugurated, I suggest you skip the part about sticking crayons in yourself. People get sort of uncomfortable when you mention stuff like that.