Fergie walks

Three days before their wedding, Josh Duhamel and Fergie held a joint bachelor and bachelorette party which should give more of an indication of how much Josh hates his life. He can’t even get naked chicks to grind on him without some f’d up monster watching him. PEOPLE describes:

“Josh and Fergie usually spend so much time away from each other, so they wanted to make this week special and spend as much time together as possible,” says a source.

“So they decided to have a joint bachelor and bachelorette party and have their friends mingle and get to know each other before the big day.”

Optometrists suspect Josh is now legally blind. To wit, when normal people look at Fergie, they see Warwick Davis still in his Leprechaun costume. When Josh Duhamel sees Fergie, he sees a puff of cotton forming a faint outline of a female figure. Probably the only reason Josh is still with her is because she can make her vagina make it feel like he’s getting a BJ.

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