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Jeremy Piven is in trouble

Here’s a rundown of what’s been going on with Jeremy Piven and the Broadway production of Speed-the-Plow. Last year, Piven was signed on to make his Broadway debut in David Mamet’s Speed-the-Plow. After a few shows, Piven then decided he didn’t want to do it anymore and requested an early release due to exhaustion. His request was denied. In mid-December, Piven’s doctor wrote him a little note saying he couldn’t perform because he had “elevated levels of mercury” from eating too much fish. Piven is an avid sushi eater.

Backers of the show called BS and investigated Piven’s claim of mercury poisoning in an effort to “squeeze some money out of him.” Page Six says that Jeremy Piven has already been examined by another doctor, but Jeffrey Richards, the lead producer, would not reveal the results citing confidentiality. However, Jeffrey added ominously, “We’re in the process of discussing what our next step will be.”

Jeremy Piven should have come up with something better than mercury poisoning from too much sushi. That’s like saying I’m too tired to work because I’ve been making out with these models every night and I might have gotten mono or I might have herniated a disc from playing too much Wii.

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capt. cornhole
capt. cornhole
15 years ago

What’s the matter with Piven, is being a power bottom a pain in the ass.