Natalie Portman @ Club

Sean Penn is married to Robin Wright Penn so it’s confusing that at a dinner at Sunset Tower Hotel’s Tower Bar on March 17, Penn and Natalie Portman were seen “constantly touching each other.” A witness says that they then went to a secluded spot to make out. Star reports:

“They went to a bank of elevators that only goes to the spa or to private rooms,” an eyewitness tells Star. “They came back about 45 minutes later, and that’s when I saw them making out.”

“There’s a door outside of the hotel’s Tower Bar that has a bridge to the terrace, so it’s semi-private,” the eyewitness explains. “I used that path to get to the restroom, and when I came back, I had to go through some curtains — and that’s when I interrupted Sean and Natalie! When they saw me, they were startled and quickly composed themselves.”

Word is Natalie managed to penetrate Sean’s permanent scowl with her tongue. Something that hasn’t happened in 40 years and an event many consider to be the first sign of the apocalypse.