David Hasselhoff

Radar reported over the weekend that David Hasselhoff’s 16-year-old daughter Hayley found him passed out on the floor in his house with what was later discovered was a BAC of .39.

A source said a frightened Hayley kept “slapping her dad’s face” to keep him alive. “He was barely breathing when they got him at the hospital.

“He’s recovering. Pam was his bedside till 4a.m. this morning. This is about the 7th time he’s been taken to a hospital over the last few years with alcohol poisoning. How many visits will it take before he dies?”

TMZ flatly denies this report claiming David’s ex, Pamela Bach, exaggerated the story to tarnish his reputation. You know, the one he got after that video of him drunkenly eating a hamburger destroyed his previous one. They say that while David had been drinking, he was nowhere near comatose. He was actually sick at the same time which, when combined with the alcohol, made things worse. That’s when David, under his own power, walked to his car and was driven to Cedars-Sinai Medical.

I like Radar’s version much better. With theirs I get to imagine a David Hasselhoff reeking of alcohol, lying face down on the ground and being dragged by his feet to the car and then driven to Cedars-Sinai where Pamela pushes his limp, lifeless body out in front of the hospital and peels off. If I know David, and I’d like to think I do, it’s how he’d want the story to be remembered.