Madonna is terrifying

Kate Hudson has been seen around town making out with Madonna’s ex, A-Rod. So it makes sense that she has an irrational fear of getting her ass kicked. Such was the case at the Veuve Clicquot’s Manhattan Polo Classic when she got word Madonna was coming with her boy toy Jesus Luz. Hudson arrived to the event disguised in a floppy hat and sunglasses. When she heard Madonna was coming at half-time, she booked it.

“Kate was completely intimidated by Madonna,” said one guest. “She clearly didn’t want trouble and decided to keep a low profile for the rest of the match.”
Said a second guest, “I didn’t even see Kate Hudson again after Madonna arrived. She ran away! But if I were dating Madonna’s ex, I’d be scared, too!”

“Madonna literally didn’t care,” said a third eyewitness.

“She showed up with no makeup, a dowdy [denim] outfit and her hair pulled up in a ponytail. She doesn’t need to compete with Kate, because she will always be Queen Bee.”

This makes Madonna sound like some sort of kingpin. Like she’s going to order a hit on Kate Hudson in the middle of the Polo Classic or put a severed horse head in her bed. If she wanted, Madonna could stalk out Kate in the lady’s room and smash her head through the stall door. She takes care of business herself. One time I saw Madonna kill a chicken with one slap. True story. I’d be scared too if I was Kate Hudson.