Lindsay Lohan probably had sex tapes

Lindsay and her dad both agree that the most recent break-in was an inside job. How does the crack team of Lohan and Lohan know this? Because “electronics weren’t taken.. just things that a certain old friend knew meant a lot to me [Lindsay].” Then if they skipped the electronics, what did they take?

The Sun-Times alleges the crooks went straight for the safe, the contents of which included “very incriminating videos and photos, plus legal documents, that LiLo believes could cause embarrassment if made public.”

One has to wonder what kind of video could be so embarrassing? Could it be sexual in nature? Does it show Lindsay dressed as Little Bo Peep and singing “I’m a little teapot” before giving a foot job? Would that be considered embarrassing or just really awesome? All these questions and no answers. Why does Lindsay have to keep us in such suspense? Why does she have to be such a jerk? If you think about it, we’re the real victims here.