The Blemish

No One Thinks Dane Cook Is Funny

By , 10:44 AM on Aug 10, 2009, 130 Comments

dane-cook-mr-brooks

was booed at the 2009 on Sunday after joking, “Vanessa Hudgens! – Girl you got to keep your clothes on!” Cook was presenting the Choice Hottie Awards to Robert Pattinson and Megan Fox.

Maybe Dane didn’t realize he was at an awards show created for 14-year-olds who idolize Miley Cyrus and High School Musical. Even the mere mention of a blemish thought to be seen on Zac Efron’s face causes the accuser to be beaten mercilessly with lip gloss and compacts. Edgy jokes for them revolve around how Miley Cyrus almost showed up to prom in her pj’s.

Then again, maybe just isn’t funny which is the case 100% of the time. “Girl you got to keep your clothes on!” Haha, get it? Because Hudgens had her nude photos leaked on the web for a second time. How timely! Who did he steal this joke from?

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  • Jorge

    Look listen i dont know y you are focusing his talent on one of his jokes. He has many other shows he has done. All of them like this one i found funny. He also makes some of his jokes direct which for some reason is funny. True i dont think that he should have made that joke at a place like that but its true and people who are booing just cant except the fact that their idol took pictures naked because shes a slut for her “boyfiend”. ( Her pictures make her look like a slut ). If their booing for other reason then i dont know wut to tell you. Thats their problem. He should not be critizied for it but it would have been smart for Dane not to play that line. Mabey he got carried away because he forgot where he was at. And if you think that certain things should be prohibited for kids then what was Dane Cook doing there. Some of his jokes are adultish.

    • Shaved Ape

      Or maybe Dane Cook is a douche.

    • peoplerdum

      jorge- i’d say “tldr” but i’m not sure you could even spell THAT right.

      dane cook is not funny. i’m pretty sure they based aziz ansari’s “funny people” character on him (read: total ass clown). also “adultish” is not even close to a word i’d use to describe dane cook. juvenile? childish? idiotic? obtuse? yeah, maybe.

      • najib

        who do you think is funny, because any good comedian like dane speaks thier mind so yeah he is childish and juvenile but that why hes loved, and anyways alot of the hosts aren’t great examples for teens like paris hilton, britney spears, christina aguilara, rob schnieder, and jack black among others because some made poor life choices, or are vulgur, and setting an unfair example for how teens should look and act

    • Riiiiiight

      So what you’re saying is that any woman who allows her boyfriend to take photos of her naked in private is a slut, and Dane Cook is funny.

      Also, “mabey he … forgot where he was at.” Right. Gee I’m up on stage, there are cameras pointed at me, bright lights, big signs all over the place… oh I know, I must be at the gym! I’m going to go out on a limb, Jorge, and say that you’re a gigantic moron.

      • najib

        so wat dane cook said was wrong but miley cyrus haveing and 18 yr bf isnt or what about her dancing around a stripper pole a ya ur right that is so for impressionable young teens, its weird how people who are fans of dane cook say hes funny but was out of line, and people like you just call him a douche

  • Ang

    Uh yeah…Dane Cook is not funny at all. I can’t believe how famous he is b/c he sucks, and I’m glad he bot booed. I don’t watch MTV, but I’m going to have to youtube that shit. lol

  • Sarah

    Dane Cook is a tool

  • Doug

    Hudgens has the body of a 12-year-old, and she thinks the world is clamoring to see it. Oh, and she stated that “she would do a nude scene” in a film. The world can rejoice.

    Dane Cook basically isn’t funny, but he got it right this time.

    • Daryl G.

      Doug; you’re a moron. The reason you probably think that most 12-year old girls have a body like that is because you’ve been banned from going within 500 feet of kids that age.

      But no, Dane Cook didn’t “do it right” this time. He’s a good actor, but as a comedian he is as talented as Paris Hilton in a soup kitchen.

      • najib

        wat the fuck does that mean, first of all how do u now how well paris in a soup kitchen is, and second of all the movies dane cook are in are alot like his stand up, its sick how when someone hits celebrity status, something they worked hard for thier either loved or hated, and another that personal attack to doug was pretty immature he was speaking his mind about dane cook and vanessa hudgens

  • Daryl G.

    The worst part about this is that it takes movie studios a few years to catch up, which is why there are so many crappy movies out there.

    I fear that Dane Cook will be forgotten in the next decade, lay low, and then come back in the 2020s screaming “IM DANE COOK REMEMBER ME AND MY MYSPACE???????”

    Since there are so many idiots in the world, people will just react with, “Hmm, that name sounds familiar… is he still alive? He must be good then! LULZ myspace!!! It was cool before Twitter, remember that?”

    And then he’ll be back…. sigh……

  • Brad

    Pudgens has no hope of enticing anyone. Dane Cook’s time is up.

  • Cpm

    Dane Cook sucks, period, exclamation point. Can’t act, not funny, pizza face tool.

    • Mpc

      Dane Cook certainly is a tool, but you know what I call someone who types out “period, exclamation point” on a fucking keyboard? That’s right: a tool. You both suck.

  • wilson

    i thought it was funny.

  • Plagiarist

    Doug, stay away from my 12 year olds.

  • Jason

    I don’t know why she’s acting like a slut and taking nude pictures of herself for her boyfriend. Everyone knows Zack takes it in the can

  • Jennifer

    This is a non-argument because Dane Cook is decidedly, manically, not funny and if you are one of Disney’s edgily commodified teens, you had better learn to lock down those SD cards. The Teen Choice Awards is a pointedly aimed PR event for anyone who actually considers “Twilight” a burgeoning studio franchise and Miley a performer with unyielding potential. Not me on both counts. It’s an awards show with surfboards and Audrina Patridge (now an actress?) Get over it.

  • Meh

    Whether he’s funny or not he stated the truth. Their are photos of her that teens and kids can see and she can’t always ignore it so he basically put it out their as a comedian, at her expense. Not nice. But she did it. Now what happens after, in her lawyers control now.

    • Daryl G.

      You’re so fucking retarded, Dane Cook is funnier than your lack of brains.

      “Whether he’s funny or not he stated the truth.”

      SO DOES THE NEWS. Semantics aside, Jerry Seinfeld put it best.

      “Nobody likes a comedian that tells the truth. You walk out of the show saying, ‘That comedian, he was so…. RIGHT. I can’t disagree with him.”

      “Their are photos of her…”

      Do you mean “there are photos of her”?

      Wow, you’re actually, literally retarded, aren’t you?

      I guess that makes me retarded for arguing with you about the job of a stand-up comedian.

      So, where do I go for treatment?

  • The Dude

    i don’t mind Dane Cook that much even he’s not that damn funny,i never really found him as annoying as say..Carrot top. But to try to discourage a hottie like Vanessa from taking naked pics is about the stupidest fucking thing i’ve ever heard. seriously, he could be more gay then Zac.

  • EvilG

    You are all idiots. Dane Cook is not funny. He never really was. His comment here was a good attempt, since Hudgens really is a slut.

    Either way, this is all irrelevant, since the Teen Choice Awards are targeted at 13 year olds.

    • najib

      ya miley dancing around a stripper pole is so good for 13 year olds too see

  • Walter Sobchak

    Buncha fuckin’ idiots in here….

    Whether or not Dane Cook is funny or not is irrelevant. People continue to pay him for his “unfunny” jokes and appearances, so the fact that some people think he’s garbage is completely subjective. So shut the fuck up and quit whining about it already. Your complaints aren’t interesting.

    As for Vanessa Hudgens’ promiscuity…. again, it’s subjective. Although I do feel it’s much closer to being an objective observation than whether or not Dane Cook is funny. While some people find some of his jokes funny, and some don’t, pretty much everyone can, or should agree that their teenage daughters shouldn’t be letting people take pictures of their tits and pussy. Repeatedly.

    I can’t wait for a picture of her blowing some guy comes out…. I’ll make sure to stop by here and read about how good, clean, and wholesome it was.

  • that guy

    Wow, I’m just going to say that I find Dane Cook humorous. That’s my opinion, so it’s not wrong, seeing as I’m not stating a fact. So don’t go on a rant about how ‘idiotic’ I am for holding that opinion.
    Anyhow, I agree he was definitely out of line to use a joke like that at the Teen Choice awards, but I still find it pretty funny. Kids nowadays need to learn that idolizing other kids is just moronic and need to lighten up.
    Ok, I’m done, go ahead and insult me.

    • najib

      i agree

  • goodwolfe

    I agree that it’s beside the point as to whether Dane Cook is funny, it’s subjective, but for the record and from my own personal polls, I believe most find him NOT funny. As an actor, he holds his own though. I believe his comment/joke was inappropriate, given the setting, and the fan base of mostly teens and tweens. Regardless of your opinion of Vanessa Hudgens, there is nothing to indicate these or the previous photos of her were meant to be anything but private had they not been hacked and leaked onto the web. Right or wrong, a lot of teen girls send photos to a boyfriend with no intention of becoming an internet sensation. This error in judgement shouldn’t make it open season for these kind of jokes. There are already Gossip Blogsites who can rake these celebs over the coals for little or no reason, so at least keep the award shows relatively of nasty, cruel comments.

    • najib

      how is he a good actor but not funny

  • http://www.shutup.com HAHA

    that guy is such a pussy

  • Chonies

    I find it HYSTERICAL that men find Dane not funny, and women find him REALLY funny and hotter than fuck. It’s all chest-beating jealousy. And I love that.

  • Jorge (again)

    Vanessa is a slut. Thos of you who belive that humans make mistakes here me out. She did pics for zac and acted and look liked a slut in both times she did that. She didnt learn cause her slut side overcomes brain power ^^

  • Brett

    If Dane isn’t funny then why does his shows sell out and why does he have such a large fan base? Its because the man is freaking funny. Maybe the reason you retards think he isn’t funny is because your sad lonely people who live in their mothers basement and will never amount to anything. The guy has a career making tons of money and you don’t, so quit bitching and get a decent job and i don’t mean the one you have at McDonalds.

  • Kyle

    Agreed Brett. Besides, I’m glad they’re working at McDonald’s…because they certainly couldn’t cut it at the BK Lounge.

  • najib

    maybe what he said was out of line and maybe he is a douche but thats whys he great he speaks his mind and all great comedians do, and one more thing i really dont think miley cyrus dancing around a pole was any more appropriate then wat dane said

  • najib

    another thing all of those family channel shows piss me off because almost every teen isnt like that, they have episodes about how a couple kids have beer and no one thinks thats cool, or having your first bf/gf an like the tenth grade, all those idols kids have have done or will do something that really is for kids, you idol them and its sick, what happened to firemen, police officers, and parents being our heroes

  • najib

    one last thing one of the biggest teen stars is miley cyrus and for years the have praised her for being a good girl, and at 1 point even said britney spears should be more like her FOR GOD SAKES SHES LIKE 15, when britney was 15 she was less slutty then miley, i can see miley in the future trying to force the jonas brothers to gang bang her

  • John

    If you want to talk about a tool, like at the punk Daryl who just keeps arguing with people about how dumb he thinks Dane Cook is. First of all daryl, no one cares how many times you say it, your one opinion of him being not funny is irrelevant to all of us no matter how many times you say it.

    If you don’t think he is funny then WTF are you doing on a dane cook thread… other than to say he’s wrong for telling a dumb little girl not to take pictures of herself naked?

  • important

    All the people who are saying that Dane Cook isn’t funny, they are Just jealous of him… And those people are just denying it, and don’t want to face the fact that he is funny. And the bad mouth people just look for one bad thing he said or done and start judging and criticizing him for that one thing just because he is a celebrity. Well guess what nobody is perfect everyone makes mistakes, so you should just face the fact and live with it. Because unless you lived HIS live don’t judge HIM because you don’t know never have and never will know every little thing and detail about HIM. And get a FUCKING LIFE and stop looking for other peoples mistakes. Because before you judge somebody/someone make sure your own hands are clean. And the only reason you people speak bad about him is because you ARE JEALOUS and you know you can’t do better then him…. Because if you could you would be famous as well, but you not so you should SHUT YOUR TRAP HOLES and don’t talk. That way you’ll help everyone out!!!

  • Burt Adams

    “who do you think is funny, because any good comedian like dane speaks thier mind”

    Only when it’s FUNNY– which leaves out Dane.
    This was the most inappropriate place and time to bring up something like this. And that’s Dane Cook right there: he has no sense of what’s even slightly funny, and so he has no sense of what’s definitely NOT funny.
    He thinks that “funny” is just jumping around like an idiot making funny “honk-honk” noises: but if he wants to be a clown then he should have joined the circus.
    And no, we’re not “jealous” of a poseur. We’re not jealous of REAL comedians like Jerry Seinfeld, who made over $100 million with his show– more than Dane Cook will ever dream about; we’re simply offended that a FAKE POSEUR like Dane Cook is stealing the limelight from GOOD comedians– people who REALLY entertain us.
    It’s a sad trend when people like Dane Cook, Paula Abdul, Britney Spears, Mariah Carey and other fakes become famous just by schoozing and connections instead of TALENT. Somewhere, there’s a lot of REALLY funny guys, who got shut out by this idiot Dane Cook just acting like a moron.

    • najib

      so your telling me that when you listen to jerry seinfeld your laughing like crazy, i dont think so, why dont you name some other comedians you like so we can criticize them, i understand that everyone has an opinion and heres mine your a flaming fuck face, P.S bert hows ernie you fucking faget