taylor-lautner-premiere

Taylor Lautner is suing McMahon’s RV for failing to deliver a fully loaded trailer worth $30,000 to him by the agreed upon date of June 21. Lautner claims McMahon’s RV breached contract and caused him “emotional distress” and “annoyance.”

Wait. You can sue for being annoyed? Well I’m annoyed at Jessica Alba for not letting me sleep with her. I’d like to sue for that. According to this contract, we should have had sex three weeks ago. What? Seems fake? No, sir. It’s written in crayon because that’s the only writing instrument I we had around at the time. I even had it notarized. Don’t you see the Hello Kitty! sticker on the bottom right?