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Apparently Jeeves has a burning desire to get his ass kicked. Professional umbrella holder Nick Cannon challenged Eminem to a charity boxing match on his New York-based radio show. He wants to settle the war between Eminem and his wife Mariah by getting his face punched in.

Nick tweeted the double negative: “I don’t have nothing to lose!!! If I get beat up no one would be surprised… It will just be more material for my stand up!” However, he did admit, “I don’t think Eminem or Jay Z are even paying attention to us!”

I’m not sure how getting beat up settles the bad blood between your wife and some other dude who brags about banging your wife. I think it’d make it worse actually. Not only will he keep singing about how he banged your wife, he’ll also sing about how he beat up her scrawny, pencil-necked husband. It doesn’t seem like Nick has thought this through.