Ryan Seacrest and Jennifer Lopez are trying to out diva each other

What’s that saying? Even though you win the Special Olympics, you’re still retarded. Well, in unrelated news, Ryan Seacrest and Jennifer Lopez are in an American Idol power struggle. A source says arguments range from who gets which dressing room to who gets top billing.

“Ryan was the one who first suggested Jennifer, but now he’s starting to regret it, because she’s acting like she’s a much bigger star than he is,” the insider says. “Ryan knows the diva behavior is likely to get worse before it gets better. Producers are trying to get them to make peace, but their egos are both pretty big.”

Let me guess. Is the insider Ryan Seacrest? Because that’s the only reason they’d say he was a bigger star than Jennifer Lopez. It’s like when I anonymously complain about how my co-workers are jealous of my big penis and bulging biceps. First of all, I don’t have co-workers. Second of all, I don’t have a big penis. Wait, where was I going with this?