Taylor Swift Destined to be an Old Maid

Backstage at the People’s Choice Awards last Wednesday, Jennifer Aniston allegedly went up to Taylor Swift, whose relationships have mimicked hers recently, to tell her to “hang in there” and that “everything will be okay.” According to a source, Jen told Taylor to “go out there and have fun.”

Jennifer Aniston giving you relationship advice is the touch of death. Taylor must be scrambling to find a guy now so she doesn’t end up boring and alone, talking about her 100 cats.

Instead of giving her advice, Aniston could have made a “come hither” motion with her finger and in a zombie voice said, “One of uuuussss,” and it’d have scared Taylor just as straight.