Andy Dick Sued For Penis Rubbing

One Robert Tucker is suing Andy Dick for allegedly rubbing his genitals against his face at a comedy club in Dallas back in December 2010.

Andy was dressed in a red skirt and wig, as he is apt to do, when he walked into the crowd, “pulled down his costume skirt with his right hand, exposing the fact that he was not wearing underwear beneath the skirt.”

At which point, Tucker says Andy “forced his genitals against the left side of [his] face,” the equivalent of drinking from a puddle of stagnant water.

Tucker was “degraded and humiliated” by Dick and his co-workers have been harassing and making fun of him ever since. He is suing for unspecified damages, naturally.

This is Tucker’s own fault for willingly being at an Andy Dick performance. But even then, the video of the incident shows Dick didn’t rub any dick on his face. It was maybe 6 inches out. Far away enough to not make contact but close enough to contract whatever std turns a grown man into gigantic douchebag.