Today’s News Brought to You by Tucker and Dale and EVIL!

Carey Mulligan is engaged to Mumford? [Celebuzz]
Ashanti is trying really hard to stay relevant. [Bossip]
Kristin Cavallari is doing damage control after being dumped by Jay Cutler. [Celebitchy]
Good news. Adriana Lima looks decent in a bikini again. [Celebslam]
Is Victoria Silvstedt hanging out or soliciting. I can never tell the difference. [Drunken Stepfather]
Lindsay thinks she can pick and choose what roles she gets now. [IDLYITW]
Gene Simmons proposes to his girlfriend of 25 years. Still creepy. [Celebs]
Summer Glau was at Comic-Con. [MoeJackson]
It’s not every day you run into a 6’10” male cheerleader. [Busted Coverage]
The baby this mother left in the car could have probably used this water. [Dlisted]
The entire cast of It’s Always Sunny knocked up their wives at the same time. Well, sort of, not really. [The Superficial]
Larissa Riquelme has a busty challenger. [Daily Fix]