If you hadn’t swooned yet today then obviously you didn’t make it into Hall H for the Twilight panel featuring such stars as Taylor Lautner, Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson and Robert Pattison’s retarded haircut.
I wasn’t there either because I’m not a lunatic. Consequently, I have no idea what questions were asked but I expect every other person wanted to know about the sex scene (it was very true to the book according to Kristen Stewart). But was there sparkly penis?! Someone answer me. Stop pretending the string cheese I’m shoving in your face isn’t a mic!
Fine. Whatever. On to more pressing matters. Namely Robert Pattinson’s hair. What. The. F**k. It looks like he had second thoughts in the middle of shaving his head. Let me guess. His new stylist is Team Jacob.
It’s for a new movie he’s doing called “My Hair Dresser Has Parkinsons”. Just kidding, it’s called “Cosmopolis.”