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Apparently crew members can’t go around slapping the asses of celebrities anymore. Damn you, zero tolerance sexual harassment policies!

TMZ reports a crew member on Charlie’s Angels was fired after slapping Minka Kelly on the butt like a cheap stripper. Rumor has it that he was holding a hundie when he did it and that Minka slapped him back.

Sources explain it didn’t happen exactly like that. They say the man did slap Minka on the ass but she responded by telling him, “Please don’t ever disrespect me or any other woman like that again.” A calm, cool, collected, but overall disappointing response. A swift kick to the nuts would have been better.

Witnesses told the bosses at ABC and the guy was immediately banned from the set and fired. Oddly enough, Minka didn’t want to get the guy canned and had nothing to do with the decision. She was friendly with the guy and upset that he lost his job after moving his family to town for it. ABC sources say the guy was a serial ass slapper and had done it to other women.

This goes to show how nice Minka Kelly is. Some guy slaps her ass and she doesn’t even want him fired. A stern lecture would have been enough. Until today, I didn’t know it was possible to be more in love with Minka. But here I am, scribbling hearts around her name in my Trapper Keeper.

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