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Jersey Shore’s Vinny Guadagnino opened up about what sex with Snooki is like on The Wendy Williams Show. If you thought it was like being jacked off with the tears of a unicorn, then you need to get your head checked you freaking weirdo. Answering William’s question of “How was Snooki in bed?,” Vinny responded,

“Umm, you ever have sex with a meatball?”

In keeping with the food theme, Williams said that Snooki compared Guadagnino to “a watermelon stuck in a pinhole.” The Wrap

This in addition to the stench of pickle juice emanating from her body. Basically sex with Snooki is like borking a pickled meatball. Be still my heart. Not even the producers of American Pie would touch that.