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Know how Rosie O’Donnell knows Tom Cruise isn’t gay? Because he drives race cars. Think about it. Gay people HATE race cars. Appearing on Piers Morgan Tonight on Sunday, Rosie explained:

A lot of people have said to me oh you know so and so…are they gay? I personally don’t know a star who I have come to know and become intimately friendly in my life with who is living a false reality. I don’t, I really don’t. People say to me all the time “Tom Cruise is gay.” I’ve been around Tom Cruise a lot. Tom Cruise drives race cars. I do not think Tom Cruise is gay. BuzzFeed

And that’s about the point John Travolta put in his order for 4 race cars. “The fastest ones you got! With v16 engines and really loud and leave off the tassels and little bell this time.”