First up, full frontal nudes of Justin Bieber’s dad are being shopped around. An insider says the photos of Jeremy Bieber was taken when he was younger and are just now making their way around. Says the source, “They look like they were taken for a Playgirl-type magazine or something.”
No word on if a deal has been made but who would want to see this? Even though he’s directly related to Justin Bieber, these are still just dick shots of some random guy. There’s so many of these on the internet that you couldn’t give them away. There’s a simple rule on the internet. Boobs = always good. Penis = aw, gross! get it away, get it away!
In related news, a lawsuit has been filed against Justin Bieber and I believe every word of it. A man claiming to be Selena Gomez’s father alleges Bieber stole his AMEX to buy penis enlargement pills, impregnated Selena on his canadian bear rug and then made her get an abortion, came to his house with Usher and sodomized him with a firework while blasting Katy Perr’s Fireworks in his ear, gave Selena a STD and stole his credit card to buy him and P.Diddy cocaine to use in drug free zones (I didn’t know dealers took credit now).