hayden-panettiere-emmy

All those letters I sent to Hayden Panettiere telling her to breakup with her NY Jets boyfriend Scotty McKnight have finally payed off. The two broke up a couple weeks ago but are “still good friends.” A source says, “They will probably be back together sometime down the road.” Yea, sure, source. Not if I can help it.

I still can’t believe my letter writing campaign worked. Now it’s time to work on Megan Fox. *Dips pen in blood, writes down awkward poem*