Don’t Write to Taylor Swift, She Won’t Read It

Planning on writing Taylor Swift fan mail? Well don’t because no one is ever going to read it not even her assistants. They’ll just be thrown in the dumpster with the rest of your hopes and dreams.

WKRN reports that Kylee Francescan was out taking his trash to a dumpster near a school (what?) in Nashville when he discovered hundreds of letters addressed to Taylor Swift from around the world.

“I was like, ‘That’s weird,'” she told Nashville’s News 2 Investigates.  “There were like hundreds of letters in there to Taylor Swift and I’m like, ‘Oh my gosh!’ I didn’t know if they were stolen [or] discarded, so I threw them in a box. And I’m like, ‘Somebody needs to let Taylor know.'”

Like any good citizen who discovers a cache of celebrity fan mail, he called the local news. They found out that someone from Taylor’s staff usually picks up the fan mail from the PO Box located at a strip mall. Whoever picks them up was probably tired of lugging that junk around and chucked it.

Francescan said he contacted Nashville News because “I know how much her fans mean to her.” Bwahahaha. Francescan is always good for a laugh.

Nashville News 2 took the letters to Big Machine Records who said they had no idea why they were in the dumpster. “Taylor gets thousands of fan letters everyday and they are delivered to her management office. After the letters are opened and read, they are recycled,” spokesperson Paula Erickson said.

Erickson continued, “The only explanation for any letters being unopened would be that a small batch of mail that was supposed to be delivered to Taylor was accidentally put with letters headed for the recycling center. We sincerely appreciate Channel 2 bringing this to our attention, and we plan to immediately pick up the mail.”

The letters have since been sent to Swift’s PR firm who’ll handle them appropriately. That is to say, they’re going to throw it in the right dumpster this time. One where some Nosy Nelly can’t dig them out and bring it back to them. That also means Taylor is still not going to read your 15 reasons on why she should marry you. Sucks for you, weirdo.